Expiry Dates
Why are there expiry dates on Mallomars:
those chocolate marshmallow cookie delights
awaited, celebrated, Tweeted on arrival and
destined for oblivion the minute the box is opened?!
That is unless someone’s trying to prove they’ve got
WILLPOWER
just like those who won’t have a smoke before noon, decaf anything, Viagra
a drink before 5
cheese on a ham sandwich,
sex before marriage…
So it isn’t with Mallomars! Get real, people!
Mallomars are to food what Victoria’s Secret goods are to sex -
GRATIFICATION and
instant or ASAP if not sooner!
Meanwhile, hold the deferrals and bring a mop to aisle 6
‘cause somebody dropped the Miracle Whip that’s good indefinitely
unless it melts ‘cause it’s all fake
not like Mallomars and
not unlike pink packaged body parts that should have expiry dates
and blue pills that do.
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